The Eighth Nerve: Solitaire
This is a book review by a hearing-impaired girl. She writes of how much and how deeply she relates to what the author of the book wrote, because the author is deaf too, and grew up in an oral world too, and what these facts so heartbreakingly mean.
And that makes there of us - every word and every experience and every feeling described is true for me as well. (Erm, except for the part about never being asked out on dates with boys.) Almost all the excerpts make me want to yell: "Hey! That’s me in there! She gets everything exactly correct! She understands perfectly!" (Except I am very much not a girl, ahem.)
If you want to understand me that bit deeper, read on.
P/S: Oh, I will be checking if I can get the book at Kino or Borders - I want it!!
I hate being unknown and feeling helpless to do anything about it. It is the worst feeling. When I shared my predictament with others, it was all to easy for them to encourage me to "just" initiate, reach out to people, become more involved, speak up, disclose, and "stop being a whiny victim". After all, I certainly looked and behaved normally enough- people would like and include me if they just knew me. But it was getting to the part where I was known that seemed nearly impossible to me. This something that most others took easily for granted was something that eluded me.
Every one of us has a story it’s true. The thing about writing about it is the issue, do you unburden all the angst and thus feel a new page has turned ? a release ? or just invoke sympathy (or worse the patronization ?). I found peers were largely among those who thought us whiners, perhaps revisiting the pain is too much, for them ? or is eaningless to those who never had hearing anyway ? I’ve started a ‘book’ on my experiences so many times,then I think who cares basically ?
Comment by MM — January 9, 2007 @ 4:14 am
Stories we tell are always a uniquely powerful way of providing us with such life-enhancing mental images. Passed along from the author to the reader, the stuff of stories brings out the imagination and stretches the capacity for feeling experience. I’m glad you’ve experienced the story the author conveys in her book.
Comment by Carl Schroeder — January 9, 2007 @ 4:22 am
Thanks for the comments. Yes, stories are powerful in that they forge a sense of bonding and belonging among those with shared, similar experiences. Oh, people care about stories - yours, mine, his, hers. Especially if they can relate or empathise with what you have gone through.
Perhaps I should pen down my experiences as well. Have shied away from it because some were too painful to relive.
Comment by Dictatorial Editor — January 10, 2007 @ 11:20 pm
This is interesting a view point about writing. In the UK there is just ONE outlet that specializes in books about deafness and deaf people. Last year I contacted the proprietors sounding them out about demand,and they told me “We have next to no books as such written by non-cultural deaf, or hard of hearing. We are overloaded with cultural and sign language books, and we would welcome more books by other deaf people, but they don’t send any to us ! Our business is used as a resource outlet too for those interested in deaf history and language and, social support workers ask where, are the books and references about non-culture;deaf ? and I am only able to say, I don’t get nay to sell !” He then offered to read a draft I made and also offered to explore if others would foot the printing bill. I still haven’t got around to it,mainly because I found the internet, and I suppose so many others have too, so,no books about OUR history or issues are likely to flood the markets in the near or far future sadly.
Comment by MM — January 11, 2007 @ 1:38 am
Hi MM, I agree there is a lack of articles, books and research about deafness and deaf people. Whatever the specific issues - pyschology, sociology, politics, culture - I find such information hard to come by in printed form, and can only learn by direct observation and involvement and experience with other deaf people.
Here in Singapore, there are no books as far as I know, on deaf issues. Perhaps this gap can be the spur for us as individuals to do something to bridge. :)
Comment by Dictatorial Editor — January 11, 2007 @ 8:44 pm
Curiously, there was a seminar held in the UK by the RAD (Royal Association of the Deaf), about 3 years ago, and they invited papers, articles, and stories in from deaf people, with a view to expanding awareness of deaf writers, via some art fund project. My friend wrote in what I thought was a very moving story based on his own battles with losing his hearing and coping with his deafness. It was returned, with a note at the bottom, “Sorry this is not acceptable as an entry, we do not encourage stories about those who support the ‘medical model’, of deafness, which are negative portrayals of deaf people.” I was shocked, and my friend quite upset about this, he fell foul of the ‘Deaf’ and ‘deaf’ terms apparently. This is another way we are deterred from entering the fray as writers, especially if the ‘cultural’ sector is behind it, everything is so political now.
Comment by MM — January 12, 2007 @ 12:38 am
Well MM, that saddens and disgusts me. I am all for unity, inclusion and community among the deaf, no matter what mode of communication they use. As long as no group (especially those advocating a particular communication philosophy) attacks or casts aspersions on others, this is the best way to go for deaf/Deaf/hoh/HI people as a whole.
Our numbers are already small, and to be fractured by petty politics, power grabs and cultural/social bias is the last thing we want.
Anyway, I’ve put up a short piece on my own thoughts on this issue on my latest post. Thanks for the spark! :)
Comment by Dictatorial Editor — January 12, 2007 @ 7:07 pm